Good Morning Yamon Ki Yesepar and Nevim Arith Hayomin:
Isaiah 61:1: The spirit of the Lord is upon me; because the Lord has anointed me to preach good tidings unto the meek, He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to them that are bound.”
I am angry and I have every reason to be angry. I could be enjoying retirement but what do I do, I drive a bus for senior citizens taking them to the grocery stores, Doctor’s appointment, hospitals etc. I drive dozens of sweet grandmothers and grandfathers who are very grateful for my assistance and I also drive one sore head. So I take this one sour, prune faced, old, bitty of a woman to Northwestern Hospital in downtown Chicago. I battle increased traffic due to the teacher’s strike, search all over the hospital for a wheel chair when we arrive, wait two and a half hours spending $10.00 of my own money parking and what does this old grump do but file a complaint against me because I did not take her route home and my route took over an hour.
You bet I am angry and it is now 2:00 AM and I am not sleeping because I am still angry, my stomach hurts, I see flashing waving lines which signal the beginning of a migraine and it is all because of this old lemon sucking woman. I try to do such a noble thing because I am such a good person and what is my reward, heart ache, that’s what, heartache, I am tired but I just continue to avoid sleep as my flames of anger are being stoked over this injustice.
I try to read my Hebrew Bible but nothing is making sense. As I am reading Isaiah 61:1, I doze off to sleep muttering: “leqero lishevuim deror (to proclaim liberty to the captives). Suddenly, I feel someone tying my hands behind my back and speaking soothingly: “Yes, you have every right to be angry, she lied about you, got you in trouble for trying to be a nice guy, go head, let it out, get angry, fly into a rage, I will bind your hands here so you wouldn’t break anything as you rage. It is the Shadow of Shin which represents consuming anger.
Then I feel something like vise grip my chest around my heart. It is the Shadow of Beth that looks like a vise and as the Shadow of Beth tightens its grip around my heart it is soothingly saying: “I understand, your heart is broken over people believing the lies about you, I will just tighten my grip a little more to hold your heart together so it does not completely fall apart.”
All of a sudden I feel something like a brace around my neck. It is the Shadow of Hei, the broken letter, the letter that looks like a rectangle with the bottom end missing, like a door way. The Shadow of Hei has slipped itself like a neck pillow around my neck making my neck stiff as the Shadow of Hei quietly spoke, “There, there, I will just brace your neck so you can only see one way and only see what is in front of you. There now you can only see the evil thing this bad woman has done to you.” The Shadow of Hei was right; I was now so focused on this woman’s lies about me that I could not see to my right where she was mourning the recent passing of her husband and son, nor could I see to my left where she is at home alone, weeping over her loneliness and fear of being left alone. I could only see what she did to me and somehow Hei, bracing my neck, did make my migraine feel a little better.
“Okay,” announced the Shadows of Shin, Beth and Hei, “Stand up and march to the ‘Looking Glass’ we will take you to Esoteric Land to a place where you can meditate on this injustice that has come upon you. As we pass through the mirror hanging from my Daleth into Esoteric Land my fogging brain starts to put the letters together “Shin, Beth, Hei” – “Hey,” I shout, “Where are you taking me, you spell out the word “Captive.” “Hee, Hee” laughed the Shadow of Shin, “You are now my prisoner of consuming anger.” “And a prisoner of self-deception and feeling spiritually superior to others,” spoke the Shadow of Beth gleefully as he tightened his grip around my heart. “Not only that,” sneered the Shadow of Hei, “I will make sure that you will only look in one direction toward the injustice done to you, unable to see another direction of a possible ministry and comfort that you could be.”
As we entered Esoteric Land I was led to a huge brick prison where I was put into a cage, left alone with The Shadow of Shin fanning my consuming anger, Beth tightening his grip so that my heartbreak would become so painful that I could think of nothing else but the injustice that the Hei kept my head pointing toward.
I thought about Luke 4:18 where Jesus quoted Isaiah 61:1 and declared He was the fulfillment of this passage. He is the one who sets the captive free. From the depths of my misery I called upon the name of the one who promised to set the captives free. In the midst of my torment there appeared a bright white light outside my cage. It was – Daleth, Resh, Resh (freedom, liberty, to fly away), they were my attorneys. The Daleth stepped forward and I felt the Shadows of Shin, Beth and Hei loosen their grip. The Daleth spoke up: “I am the attorney Daleth, I represent an open door, and you may pass through me to be free if you will listen to your other two attorneys, the twins Resh, Resh. The first Resh stepped forward with a document entitled Repentance. I recalled how Resh represents repentance. The first Resh explained that this document was my confession. I must repent for allowing the Shadow of Shin to enter my life and bring the consuming anger upon me. I realized I was blaming the little old lady (LOL’s we call them) when really it was my own will that opened the door to the Shadow of Shin. The document also stated that I opened my heart to the Shadow of Beth by feeling spiritually superior for performing my services and allowing the Shadow of Beth to bring me into self-deception that I was this great righteous person when I was nothing more than just a sinner in need of a Savior. Finally, the document stated that I allowed the Shadow of Hei to make me stiffed neck so that I could only see my injustice and not the hurt and pain of this person who brought this injustice upon me. It made me too focused on my own hurt that I ignored the pain of another.
Resh’s twin then showed me another clause in the confession. Resh also represents returning to your core values. The confession read that one of my core values was forgiveness. I was to forgive this person for the injustice brought upon me.
At the bottom of this confession I saw I John 1:9: “If we confess our sins he is faithful and just to forgive us of our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”
I tearfully signed this confession as the Shadows of Shin, Beth, and Hei told me I was a being a fool to sign it, it was not my fault, it was all her fault, she had no right to lie about me and insult me. But I just kept looking into the light of the Savior who was handing me this confession to sign through his representatives Daleth, Resh Resh (liberty, freedom) and all I wanted was to be freed from this torment. I signed the document and with a howl of pain the Shadows of Shin, Beth, Hei (captivity) vanished and I suddenly woke up in my office, the mirror on my Daleth was glowing, the migraine was gone, my stomach craved food and no longer hurt. I looked at my Hebrew Bible and I saw Daleth, Resh, Resh (Liberty) smiling and waving at me.
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Clyde and Laura
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