Good Morning Yamon Ki Yesepar and Nevim Arith Hayomim:

Nehemiah 7:5: “Then my God put it into my heart to assemble the nobles, the officials and the people to be enrolled by genealogies.”

I was reading the various commentaries on this passage and it seems all of them pretty much said the same thing and that was that Nehemiah recognized that if he had a good idea it had to be from God.  Somehow I just can’t picture Nehemiah with his hands in his pocket, looking down at the ground, running his toe around the dust saying: “Aw chucks, I ain’t so smart, it was God’s idea.”

In Nehemiah 4:17 we learn that while building the wall: “those who carried burdens took their load with one hand doing the work and the other holding a weapon.”  Now that made good sense just like enrolling the people in genealogies. However, we don’t see God getting credit for that brainstorm.

There is the story that during World War II about a battalion of soldiers coming under fire.  Everyone jumped into a fox hold except the chaplain who stood standing watching the activity.  A soldier called up to the chaplain: “You’d better get into a fox hole Padre or you could  get hurt.”  The chaplain replied: “Oh, the Lord will protect me.”   The soldier replied, “The Lord will protect me too, but I sure would like to make his job easier.”

So where does the common sense that God put into us leave off and where do the great ideas from God come in?   Is it true what the commentators say that every good idea we have comes from God and the bad ideas is our own fault?  Or did God instill us good common sense and expect us to use it to survive and only on really special occasions when we are really stumped does God “put it into our hearts.”

Taking a look at this phrase in the Hebrew on the surface makes it little sense. It is literally translated: “And he is giving Elohim of me unto a heart of me.”   Even using proper syntax it is still confusing: “And Elohim of me is giving unto a heart of me.”  Ok let’s put it through that syntax filter once more: “My God is giving unto my heart.”   With the ambiguous nature of the Hebrew Language it takes no stretch of the imagination to render this like a good charismatic – “God laid it upon my heart to do this.”

But soft, why use the word “Nathan”  rather than kalam, chachad or any number of other words which would more easily be rendered as “put.”  Why use this word “Nathan?”   Nathan means to give.  It is spelled the same way in Hebrew backward or forward  “Nun, Taw, Nun.”    It has the idea of giving out and what you give out will return to you

Anyways, now that….uh, excuse me a second.  “Nun” stop pulling on my pant leg, what do you want?“   Ok, gang, can you hold off a second, Nun wants me to step behind the Daleth and go through the “Looking Glass.“  He claims to have some insight into this matter.

(Narrative behind the Looking Glass)

As the Nun and I walk through the “Looking Glass” the Nun suddenly changes into the number  50 (Nun is the number 50) and starts riding on the back of a flopping fish (Nun means fish in Hebrew) like a rodeo cowboy on a bucking bronco.  “Hop on” shouts the Nun, which I do and suddenly we are off riding through a wheat field.  Nun  (50), grabs a measure of wheat and says: “Here hold this.”   Ever try to hold a pile of wheat while riding a bucking bronco fish?  Off we go again.  Then Nun shouts out to me: “What day is it tomorrow?”   “Tuesday” I say.  “No,” says Nun, “What day is it?”   “April 19th” I shout back.  “Stop talking like a Western Christian and look behind you” says Nun pointing.  I see the name of the town we just left.  “Passover” I shout.   “Bingo,” says Nun. I look forward and I see the town we are approaching, it is “Shavuot.” As we approach the gates of Shavuot the fish suddenly rears up like a stallion and the gates open.  As soon as the gates open I understand.

You see the Nun is the number 50.  Esoteric rabbis believe there are 50 gates of understanding.  The fiftieth gate is the fish gate. The fifty gates correspond to the fifty days of Omer (literally, a measure of wheat),  the period between Passover and Shavuot.  Passover commemorates the escape from enslavement in Egypt, and Shavuot celebrates the transmission of the Torah to Moses on Mt. Sinai.

I dismount from the galloping fish which suddenly turns back into a Nun.  I turn to my friend 50 who has turned back to a Nun.  Now I have two Nuns calling for their cousin Taw to join them standing between them.  Taw represents truth and understanding. When Taw arrives I see them standing in formation “Nun Taw Nun.“ or forming the word Nathan (to give).

My friends  ask: “Now that you have passed through the Nun gate, or fish gate (the gate of understanding) , do you know who we really are?”  Smiling I say: “You mark the process of breaking out of bondage and moving toward  home.”  “Bingo again” smiles Nun. “What else?” Taw asks.     Again the understanding came as to why Nathan is used in the phrase: “He gave it into my heart.”  Esoterically, Nehemiah is saying:  “God put in my heart an idea to break me out of the bondage of confusion and bring me home.”

When we face the tough choices where every choice seems like a good idea, and we are frustrated, confused and in bondage, then we need to look at our heart and see what our heart says, because it will reflect the Nun and God’s choice to lead us out of the bondage of confusion.

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