Psalms 103:2: “Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits:”
Sometimes it is really hard to bless the Lord. The old soul gets knocked down, dragged out and stomped upon and the last thing it wants to do is praise the Lord. It would just like to crawl under yon rock from whence it came, lick its wounds and feel sorry for itself.
I can’t be sure but I tend to think this was David’s situation in verse 2. David’s soul was really beat up. His best friend betrays him, his own son plots to overthrow him and succeeds sending David out into the wilderness with a few faithful followers. If things weren’t bad enough some Benjamite start throwing rocks at him. David knew what it was like to have a tormented soul. It is really hard to grab hold of your soul and command it to praise the Lord when everything that is within you is also suffering.
Yet, David knew what to do, he commanded his soul to remember all the benefits of God. One translation says His kind deeds. Another says all His rewards or all the good things He has done. The majority, however, stay with the word benefits. In our culture we hear the word benefits we are automatically thinking of things involved with employment like health insurance, 401k’s, vacation days. In other words these are things that really have nothing to do with the type of work you do, it is just an incentive that an employer gives to keep you on board and happy. Somehow, for me personally I never did sign on with God for the benefits, I signed on because He loved me and I wanted to love Him. So for myself, I need to find another English word rather than benefits.
The word benefit in Hebrew is gimal, like the Hebrew letter which is also the name for a camel. What does a camel have to do with benefits? The word gimal has its origins in the Phoenician language and means stopping, weaning, going without and repaying in like kind. It is used for a camel because of the camel’s ability to go without food and water for a length of time. The service of a camel will increase with the care that is given to it. It other words you care for your camel and he will take care of you, he will repay you in like kind. Camels are believed to have been domesticated around 2,500 BC although the only evidence found for domesticated camels in the Arabian Peninsula is around 930 BC which would date it about the time of Abraham. So gimal is likely a word related to the domesticated camel.
A camel in ancient times was key to survival in the desert. In fact one meaning behind the letter Gimal is lovingkindness. The letter itself is a picture of a man running to offer assistance to someone. This is where I have a problem plugging in the word benefit for gimal. When I think of benefits I think of the benefits I get off my job. My employer gives it as an incentive, not because he is filled with lovingkindness and adores me, he wants something from me, he wants my pound of flesh and if he doesn’t get it I can kiss those benefits goodby. Perhaps somewhere in the distant past an employer offered benefits because he cared for his employees, but I don’t get that feel today. So I want to seek another word which for me would be the word lovingkindness. This word is an acceptable rendering for gimal. In fact if someone shows lovingkindness to you it will be chock full of benefits. Only these benefits will come from a heart of love and not a sense of obligation. Thus David is saying forget not his lovingkindness.
Today in church the woman who directs our food pantry told of a fifteen year old girl who came one day to volunteer. After the work day ended the director asked her why she came to help, she never saw this fifteen year old teenager before. The girl told how as a small child her father had an accident on the job and was paralyzed. When she was ten years old he passed away leaving her mother alone to raise and take care of fourteen children. The mother developed health problems which included heart problems and she had a problem with her neck that left her paralyzed on one side. This little child was left to face amazing hardships. Then one day not too long ago her best friend committed suicide. This young teenager girl, just a child was so traumatized that she could not get out of bed for two weeks. During this time of deep depression and despair she remembered how her aunt had taken her as a small child to the church to help out in the food pantry and she just remembered the love that was there. She called the church and volunteered. The day she was scheduled her ride fell through, but she was still determined to work in the food pantry to help others in unfortunate situations. So she walked to the church, a half hour walk.
In the midst of her despair she thought on the benefits or the lovingkindness of God and like the gimal she sought to return that kindness. As a result God is healing her soul. Now come on, if a little teenage girl living in the midst of such a life that, as Thomas Paine said: “Tries men souls” and she can turn to the lovingkindness of God and seek to return that lovingkindness, I mean what is wrong with you or me? We have the ability to begin the healing process of our souls today if we will do as David and this young teenager girl and reach out for the gimal.
This past week there were events in my life that dragged my soul through the miry clay. Yesterday I met a couple who just praised me for my writings and my books and said oh, such wonderful things and how much they were blessed by my work. Yet, that did not drag me out of the mud. In fact I felt worse than ever, I felt like such a big hypocrite. That evening I went over my mailing list and I ran across the name of a couple who I had once taught a Hebrew class. They were a husband and wife team who ministered together in the Chicago area. I had not spoken with them in three years. Oddly, I had their phone number tucked away so I gave them a call to see how things were going and maybe try to reconnect. I learned that the husband had passed away. My soul cried out for this widow who was left alone struggling to keep the ministry going that she and her husband had started together. I stopped by this afternoon and paid a visit with this woman and we shared about the gimal the benefits or the lovingkindness of God together. You know what, I could actually feel my soul once again begin a healing process.
Is your soul battered and beaten down? Don’t forget His gimal His lovingkindness.
PS Yesterday I went to the zoo with a friend and paid a visit with the gimal (camel) He was just sitting in the sun resting. He looked over at me and said: “The crowds, the noise doesn’t bother me one bit, see how peaceful I am that is what the peace of God is like.”
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